Let Me Show You My Middle Finger

[jpskewedthrone]

OK, so somehow last night during the gym, I bruised the middle finger on my right hand. I seriously don't know how this happened, but it just goes to show you that us teachers really overuse our middle fingers, let me tell you. *grin*

Or perhaps it has to do with taxes. Let me rant at you:

Today, I gathered the stack of envelopes that had arrived starting in January with the idea that I'd get started on my taxes (since I'll be at a math conference this weekend, and Norwescon next weekend, which leaves little time for actually doing them in the next few weeks). So, I sat down, popped the TurboTax CD into the computer to get it downloaded, then opened the first envelope.

And the suckage began. Because this first envelope wasn't a W2 form or a 1099 form or anything like that. It was a bill from the IRS. They'd gone back (for some unknown reason) and looked at my 2005 and 2006 taxes and decided to penalize me and the new penalty was due in February. WTF! I mean, it's completely my fault for assuming the envelope from the NYS IRS had something to do with the 2008 tax season and not opening it, but really. It came in January 2009. Assuming it had to do with 2008 taxes is not really entirely out there.

But anyway, I called and told them what had happened and got the "new" penalty for not paying the "old" penalty on time and paid that. So then I stalked my apartment, fuming, because the penalty I'd incurred was because I wasn't psychic and didn't predict exactly how much money I'd make that year. And even if I had taken more money out on the off chance that I'd make more money than expected, I'd be penalized for having TOO HIGH a refund. So they get you coming or going and I'd be damned if I was going to bend over to make it easier.

I exploded when George got home, so he got the major earful. And after that I sat down to start the taxes for 2008. And guess what? I didn't predict how much money I'd make correctly THIS year either, because I had no clue that the German rights would sell. So I got a sizeable chunk of completely unexpected and unpredictable money . . . and so I'm going to be penalized yet again. (I knew about the German deal, but had no clue when the actual check would be cut and sent and I'd get actual money, as opposed to just knowing money was on the way. This is a major problem with being published. Take note.)

So, on the first run-through, I did everything with the standard deductions and whatnot and when the final amount due (including penalties) hit the TurboTax bar I almost swallowed my own face. The suckage was that great. So before panicking completely, I went back and redid everything by itemizing (and remembering that I'd bought a new computer for writing purposes last year) and when all that went through I merely swallowed my tongue.

But in good news, the state of Missouri owes me $13!!!

Obviously, how much I owe will not be admitted publicly, but I keep reminding myself that the only reason I owe so much is because I sold the German foreign language rights! which is a rocking way to owe money. I mean, it basically means I had a good year on the writing front, and since writing years go up and down, with huge highs and huge lows, I'll take the high when I get it.

But honestly, what's up government? I mean, penalizing me because I can't predict the future? And penalizing me again if I've attempted to predict the future but overpaid instead? Who the fuck set up that system? Isn't it enough that when I calculate my taxes by the actual tax day, on time, I actually pay them? I mean, I PAY THEM! ALL OF THEM! ON THE DAY YOU SAY THEY'RE DUE! Why am I being penalized for this? Hmmm!?!?!?!

Comments

[barbhendee.livejournal.com]

Oh, Josh, you poor thing. I'm so sorry. I don't know if you remember me. We met at Norwescon last year. I think we did the "Liars Panel" together.

I really struggled with getting the whole "tax situation" down in 2004--when we too started making some serious money from our writing. After doing our taxes for that year, I almost swallowed my face too. It was awful.

I pay our taxes for our writing money on a quarterly basis, and like Anghara above, I've started going to a professional accountant (I bring him organized sheets with our deductions). He estimates our quarterly payments for the current year (based on the previous year), and as long as I make the payments based on these projections (on time), we will not be penalized no matter how much money we make in the current year. Bying TurboTax cost me about $80 and the accountant costs me $180 . . . but he's completely worth it.

I hope this is helpful, and I really feel bad for you.

[jpsorrow.livejournal.com]

Of course I remember you (and significant other). We also sat in on a crit session or two at Norwescon, as well as the Liars panel. Can't wait to see everyone one the west coast again in just over a week!