I've been poisoned!

[jpskewedthrone]

So last night it became incredibly apparent that I had food poisoning. And by incredibly apparent, I mean that I did enough indepth and detailed research to write a sequel called "The Porcelain Throne". I believe that the food culprit was a thing of Ranch salad dressing that I blithely squirted onto my sub two nights ago. Upon rummaging through the refrigerator looking for likely assassins, I discovered that this particular salad dressing had expired in February. It did not smell bad or taste bad, but it has been tossed nonetheless. Everything else I ate was either eaten by my partner as well (who's fine), or could not possibly have been spoiled and caused me harm.

So, no revising got done today. I've been mostly sleeping, with the occasional (and abrupt) awakening followed by a rush to the bathroom. I think it's over now though. At least the Porcelain Throne part.

And, now that everyone is totally grossed out with all of those blatant yet subtle images, here are the answers to the cover art snippet contest! I'll also unlock all of the entries that did not contain email addresses or snail mail addresses at that post, so people can see how others did in comparison. There were a few teams entered (meaning more than one person helped get the titles in the end) which is fine. But anyway, the answers!

1. The Dragonbone Chair, Tad Williams
2. A Game of Thrones, George R.R. Martin
3. Wizard's First Rule, Terry Goodkind
4. Assassin's Apprentice, Robin Hobb
5. Goblin Quest, Jim C. Hines jimhines
6. Spirit Gate, Kate Elliott kateelliott
7. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (or Philosopher's Stone), J.K. Rowling
8. The Golden Key, Melanie Rawn, Jennifer Roberson, and Kate Elliott
9. Furies of Calderan, Jim Butcher
10. Poison Study, Maria V. Snyder
11. The Magic of Recluce, L.E. Modesitt, Jr.
12. Devlin's Luck, Patricia Bray pbray
13. Redemption of Althalus, David & Leigh Eddings
14. Lies of Locke Lamora, Scott Lynch
15. His Majesty's Dragon, Naomi Novik
16. The Skewed Throne, Joshua Palmatier jpsorrow
17. Ship of Magic, Robin Hobb (oops! I didn't intend to use the same author twice)
18. The Eye of the World, Robert Jordan
19. Tigana, Guy Gavriel Kay
20. The Name of the Wind, Patrick Rothfuss

Congrats to everyone who participated! It was fun reading everyone's trials and tribulations getting all of the titles. There will likely be another such contest . . . sometime in the distant future.

Comments

[rugor.livejournal.com]

While a new book of yours is always a good idea, I think the Porcelain Throne can wait. I certainly wouldn't want to put you through the pain of further research.

Glad you're feeling better.

[llwheeler.livejournal.com]

Argh, I KNEW I knew #2! Excuse me while I go bash my head against the wall. (And sorry to hear about the food poisoning.)

[ruthannereid.livejournal.com]

Ooooog, NOT fun. *dabs your forehead with damp cloth*

[footlingagain.livejournal.com]

Four months out-of-date Ranch dressing? *blinks*

Well, I'm glad that the worst part is over and I hope you're fully recovered soon.

I have such visions of The Porcelain Throne stuck in my head, that you don't have to go to the effort of writing the book. Really.

[mindseas.livejournal.com]

Hope you feel better soon!

[jaxom92.livejournal.com]

The food poisoning is terrible, but OMG I had quite the laughing fit over your sequel comment. That was brilliant.

[jpsorrow.livejournal.com]

Well I'm glad someone got a laugh over my intestinal discomfort. *grin*

[barbarienne.livejournal.com]

Am I allowed to be smug that I was the first to get all of them? At least of the people who posted to the blog.

Hmmm. Considering all the work it took, yes, I do believe I will be smug. :-) The rest of my team can be smug with me.

That was so much fun!

[jpsorrow.livejournal.com]

You may indeed feel smug.

Watch for a repeat of the contest . . . many months from now.

[darkspires.livejournal.com]

Suggest you go to the grocery store and purchase some fennel/anise. It doesn't taste nasty and will calm the pipework. It can be cut up raw in salads; both the stalks and the bulb.

Rhubarb is also a good idea when cooked. It is a natural antiseptic. Visions of the Porcelain Throne are quite graphic. Sell by dates are important. Don't put yourself through this misery again.

[jpsorrow.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the suggestions!

Poisoned?

[(Anonymous)]

What did you expect? It's the mayonnaise, of course.
JB